July 18

This big brother was once in the hospital bed, sleeping 23 of the 24 hours in a day with a baseball-sized bleed on his brain. There was swelling of his brain, and he couldn’t walk or use his left arm. His eye would wander and couldn’t focus. It was an unbelievably scary time. 

But God.

He held CB in His hands. Kept him breathing. Kept the ventilator way away from him. Kept his vitals perfect – and I mean perfect. 

There was imminent discharge with a swelled brain and a seizure on the verge.

But God. 

There was a nurse practitioner who rounded whom we hadn’t seen in 10 days of being in the hospital. She called the best neurologist in Memphis, and within hours a helicopter had landed to take CB to LeBonheur.

Days later he had his first brain surgery and 24 hours in ICU. Three days later was his last brain surgery, and he recovered in his regular room. We rolled out of the hospital three days after that. He couldn’t walk when we got home, but he walked again by his 2nd birthday three weeks later.

Upon every passing day in the month of July, there are so many memories of what we were doing on that particular day in 2009 and 2010. Seven and eight years have passed since God walked us through some of the most challenging days of our lives. 

But God. 

Oh, He always has a plan. What’s the plan for this dude? I cannot wait to find out. He is quick to stand up for truth, and it is one of the most incredible things I have seen. As a momma, coming out of the ferocious 2s, 3s, and 4s with “one of the most strong-willed children God ever created,” to see our 8-year-old stand for what is good – oh wow, what a gift. Sure he’s a brother who falls down to temptation in a real way daily. But God is so kind to show us glimpses of His work in a young heart.

Affliction and trials are sometimes blinding and seem oppressive and make one unable to see the big picture. But once God lifts that particular time up and allows you to see some of the why’s, it is breathtaking. We still await God’s revealing of what CB is called to do with his life for God’s glory, but we are crazy thankful for His walking us through heavy affliction for our good and His glory. 

Sometimes God doesn’t plan for a redemption in affliction, and for that I cannot even fathom the heartache so many families and friends experience. I will tell you it doesn’t fall on blind eyes. We have been near losing both CB and my husband. But in all God’s ways, there is His gentle hand, His comforting grace, His beautiful carrying of His children. Fall hard on Him. He is enough. He sees you and hears you and wants you to come to Him. May we find comfort in Him in all our days.


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